All I ask is for a beating heart.
Please. Please. Please.
Reminding myself to breathe is as hard as your first solo breath will be.
There are no words for this feeling. Do I even feel? I am so unnattached from my body because it's not mine anymore. It's been yours for 39 weeks and 1 day. Your dad and I don't care about this body anymore. I think I'm still in there somewhere but who cares what happens to me as long as you eventually come home safely.
So much pain. Indescribable pain. This body of mine is falling apart absolutely determined that you are not going anywhere until I know there is a place for you at Children's. Keep with me, babe. I can hold out as long as you can.
Your short life has been hell for you and my heart breaks 25 hours a day. I can't tell whether the physical pain of my early labor pains is worse than how bad my heart aches for your safety.
We will conquer all the other obstacles after we come home as a family. Please, baby boy, please just make it home.
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Not Forgotten
I thought this blog was a thing of my past, a tribute to the road I've traveled in finding happiness and growing into adulthood. Never thought I'd find myself here again but turns out that I haven't quite figured it all out yet.
The run-down house mentioned in my last post (one year and a few days ago) has become quite the home; a home that includes a nursery :) . My wonderful husband and I have turned that skeleton of a house into a beautiful home that is bursting at the seams with love. We are expecting our son Robert's arrival on 12/19, but fingers crossed for an early arrival!
I didn't want 2012 to pass without a single post (since I'm sure I'll have my hands full in about 24 days) so I'll sign off with a promise that 2013 will bring many changes to this blog.
Gone are chronicling the beaten down days of dating woes, wedding planning stresses, and struggling to find my place in life. I am home. I am loved. And soon (but not soon enough!) the smallest member of our wolfpack will be home and bring us a level of love we've only heard of.
Happy holidays to all!
The run-down house mentioned in my last post (one year and a few days ago) has become quite the home; a home that includes a nursery :) . My wonderful husband and I have turned that skeleton of a house into a beautiful home that is bursting at the seams with love. We are expecting our son Robert's arrival on 12/19, but fingers crossed for an early arrival!
I didn't want 2012 to pass without a single post (since I'm sure I'll have my hands full in about 24 days) so I'll sign off with a promise that 2013 will bring many changes to this blog.
Gone are chronicling the beaten down days of dating woes, wedding planning stresses, and struggling to find my place in life. I am home. I am loved. And soon (but not soon enough!) the smallest member of our wolfpack will be home and bring us a level of love we've only heard of.
Happy holidays to all!
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
